Dear little one,
You’ll be turning 2 in exactly a week’s time. Papa has been procrastinating in writing you this note as I wasn’t sure if any writing of mine would justify how I feel… and I’m not like Mama who can write so superbly well (you let me know next time if my evaluation of this matter is right okay? Haha…). But as the day draws nearer, the compulsion to jot down my thoughts and feelings about you becomes larger and larger, especially after God brought the song below to my mind once more.
Even though it’s been close to two years, Papa still remembers very clearly the day you were born, your first cry, how tiny and delicate you were… and how you first opened your eyes to check the world out, all wrapped up. You’ll probably have no recollection of all these, but it’s Papa’s privilege that I was the first person you actually trained your eye (you had the super cute one eye opened one eye closed moment) on.
I’m thankful that circumstances led me to be able to spend most parts of these past two years as a stay home dad to you. I remember the apprehension I had initially, not about not wanting to spend the time with you, but not knowing if I was up to mark. This, especially after those uber long times it took to get you to sleep.
I’m thankful that things panned out beautifully. Seeing you smile in the midst of your baths, your eyes trained on me while drinking your milk from the bottle, you looking on curiously in the kitchen in your rocker while Papa prepared his weird lunches, you checking out the world when Papa brought you out in the carrier, the undivided attention you gave when Papa talked to you about the cars, the lorrys, the motorcycles, the trains, the trees, the birds in the sky, how the train has to stop at each station to pick up passengers, how we would anticipate the closing of the doors together… haha.
I’m super, super thankful for the extended time that we had in Melbourne last year. Those uninterrupted times of bringing you around the beautiful city in the carrier, walking for kilometers at times, while Mama studied in school or outside. It got even better when you started to walk; those times spent at the gardens seeing you take your little wobbly steps, blowing bubbles, tricking you into thinking that those funny noises were a result of you walking over the sewer covers and random objects in the fields… till now you still walk over drains here, thinking that you’ll hear those sounds… Haha. But perhaps you’ve known all along that it’s Papa’s voice… now that you walk over them and look at me expectantly. 🙂
And slowly… all the words in the song below came to pass. That “some day”, “one day”… they’ve all become present day. Now it’s your turn to tell me about the cars, the lorries, the motorcycles… but you know the greatest part, my boy? When you were just a baby two years ago and when I used the song for your one-month celebration montage, the chorus of the song was something that I always had to imagine how it would be like when the time comes. It is a tremendous privilege and blessing to be able to hold your little hand and walk around this great big world, my little one. And that joy in you and those daily hugs and kisses that you’ll give after running up to me on weekday evenings now… Papa will make sure that even though the form of expression may change as you grow up, that substance of familial joy will be something that will always be a part of you.
Looking forward to the days, the months, the years… of seeing you grow, and interacting with you through every stage. Thanking God for you daily, for the privilege to become a daddy, and for the greater understanding of the love of God the Father. Blessed 2nd birthday, my dear Noah. May you ever grow in the fruit of the Spirit by His grace and blessings… just as you have learned to recite it so cutely – lufff, zoy, peas, patience (clearest by far!), kindness (not bad too!), goodness (yup!), faifffulness, genterness and seth controo (haha!) 🙂
GREAT BIG WORLD
McDermott/True Blue Music
You’re just a baby now
Sleeping in your mamas arm
Someday you’ll be walking
And talking and running
And wanting to know everything
I know it’s going to happen to you
It happened to me
There are birds in the back yard
A crafty cat, and a friendly dog
So much to learn about
A big blue sky
A garden, trees to climb
So much to learn about
But you wont have to learn alone
Some day I’m gonna hold your little hand
Walk around this great big world
There are bugs that bite, flies that light
Moon at night it’s a great big world
There are rainy days, sunny days,
Snow and wind and clouds in the sky
You’re just a baby now
Swinging from your daddy’s arm
Some day you’ll wear real clothes
We’ll play all day, we’ll walk out our front door
Into the mysterious world
Where everything’s new again